Getting to Know Her Students Leads to Conversion

Jennifer Ludtke is a math teacher at Chaparral High School in Las Vegas, Nevada. For the past seven years she has spent most of her time lecturing and answering questions from her students. Although she kept a mental list of some of the students who impressed her, because of their impressive interaction with other students and faculty alike, she was never able to learn much about their backgrounds.

That all changed several years ago when the school decided to begin a new counseling program. The program got her to interview different students for approximately 20 minutes per day. Through the interviews, she was not only able to give students suggestions and provide help where needed, but she was also able to finally learn a little more about their backgrounds.

She recalls that one of the students that made a lasting impression on her was a student named Amanda who became one of her student aids. She made the following comments:

I watched with admiration how she interacted with others. I noticed that she respected herself and was considerate of others. She was admired by all who knew her. During one of our interviews, she mentioned to me about the importance of agency. I thought that was an odd word for a sixteen year old girl to use. In fact, I’d never heard a teenager use that word before. Amanda explained to me that she used the word often, particularly with her family, and that it was an important part of her LDS theology.  She was just a junior in high school and I’d known her for three years at this point.

She states that the thing that impressed her the most about Amanda was her deep understanding and knowledge of religious doctrines. Ludtke had been raised as a Catholic and had met very few Mormons in her life. What she thought she knew about Mormon theology was what she had learned by watching television shows such as “Big Love.” Amanda was able to clear up the misconceptions that she had. She assured her teacher that those portrayed in the television show are not a part of The Church of Jesus Christ. She also explained that Mormons are Christians, and assured her that there is only one mom in her home.

Because of the conversations that she had with Amanda, she began to wonder how many other Latter-day Saint students were in her class. Amanda named a few students whom Ludtke also admired and respected. Although each of the students Amanda named had their own talents, abilities, and personalities, and were of different ethnic cultures and backgrounds, Ludtke considered each one to be outstanding. She further commented:

I tried to analyze what made these young students so outstanding. Amanda was very studious and popular with the boys. When she started dating at 16, I asked her why she didn’t date the two boys I knew wanted to take her out. She replied, “I don’t appreciate their arrogance.” I was so impressed! As an experienced educator, I recognized immediately that this was not normal behavior for a 16 year old. Heather was gregarious and loved theater. Koby was an outstanding athlete. These outstanding LDS youth and others often had little in common but I was drawn to them all. I respected them. I wondered what it was that made them different.

Finally I started to recognize some of the character traits they had in common.  They were cheerful, full of confidence and enjoyed a healthy self-esteem.  They knew who they were and what they wanted out of life.  They seem satisfied and confident in their religious beliefs.  They were kind and considerate to other people.  They were respectful to their parents and teachers.  They radiated goodness. They were disciplined and well behaved.

A Visit from Mormon Missionaries

About a year after discovering the religious beliefs of her wonderful students, she received a visit from two full-time missionaries of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints who wanted to share a message with her. She told the two young missionaries that she knew one thing about the Church, and that is they raise wonderful kids.

At first she had no interest in becoming a member of The Church of Jesus Christ, but she was interested in knowing what religious doctrines the youth were being taught that made them such commendable people. She was so impressed with what the missionaries taught her during that visit that she invited them to come back.

She struggled with a few of the doctrines the missionaries taught her, such as baptisms for the dead, nevertheless as she continued to read, ponder, and pray, she gained a personal testimony that the Church is true. She was baptized on 30 July 2010 and currently serves as a teacher in the Relief Society of the ward she attends. The story continues.

A Prayerful Home

We prayed a lot in my home growing up. We had family prayers in the mornings before school, over our meals, and in the evenings before bed. I would often see my mom and dad praying individually, and we were each encouraged to pray on our own every day. We had family lessons about prayer and witnessed miracles wrought in our family because of faithful prayers.

I don’t know what I’d do without prayer. Because of the role prayer played in my childhood, I felt better prepared for creating my own life in my adulthood. Mormonism taught me key life skills, prayer being one of the most important. My home life in Mormonism helped me develop a real and intimate relationship with God, one that I wouldn’t know how to cultivate in any other way.

A Family-Centered Life

I spent much of my free time with my family, even as a teenager. I had a wonderful group of friends, and I saw them often, but when it came down to it, I usually preferred to spend a Friday night with my parents and siblings watching a movie and chowing down on popcorn. Many of you may think that’s weird, and you wouldn’t be the first. But here’s the thing: Mormonism taught me that my family relationships are for eternity. Because of that truth, those relationships have always been the most important to me.

I moved away to college in a separate state after I graduated from high school, and I missed my family greatly. The miraculous thing about this time in my life, however, is that even though I missed my family, I never felt socially handicapped by the ties I had to my parents and siblings. On the contrary, because I was so sure in the security of those relationships, I felt more confident in branching out on my own and making new friends.

I realize that not everyone has had a family life that is conducive to loving ties. What Mormonism has taught me about those circumstances is that Jesus Christ can heal any wound and repair any injustice. He can heal your heart and help you move on from hurt and pain. It’s because of our Savior that loving family relationships are possible in the first place. If you did not grow up in a happy family environment, that does not mean that Mormonism is not for you. In fact, you can find that elusive peace through The Church of Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ is the one who makes it possible for you to build your own happy family for your children.

A Life Guided by the Holy Ghost

When I was baptized into The Church of Jesus Christ when I was eight years old (the earliest age a person can choose to be baptized) I was also blessed with the gift of the Holy Ghost. Mormons believe that while the Holy Spirit can touch others’ hearts and be with them when on occasion, having the gift of the Holy Ghost is different and more profound. Having the gift of the Holy Ghost means that if you stay worthy and keep the promises you’ve made with God that you can have the Spirit with you all the time. That’s a big deal.

Because of the gift of the Holy Ghost, I’ve felt God guiding and directing my life, far more than I think I would have otherwise. The feeling of the Holy Ghost is sweet, gentle, and palpable. I have felt comfort when heartbroken and courage when scared. The bigger decisions in my life, while they have certainly been my own, have also been gently guided by the Holy Ghost, whose direction is one with Heavenly Father’s. I know if I live worthy to have the Holy Ghost with me that God will never allow me to direct my life in a way that is not for my good. I have had several experiences where what I wanted wasn’t what I needed, and I felt the soft promptings of the Holy Ghost leading me away from certain choices.

Because I’ve allowed the Holy Ghost to play an active role in my life, I don’t question or regret anything that’s happened. The only times I regret are the ones in which I failed to listen to the Spirit, making choices that weren’t what Heavenly Father wanted for me. And even in those situations, it was the Holy Ghost who led me to forgiveness and back to the right path for me.

Mormonism Has Helped Create Me

I wouldn’t be who I am right now without the influence of the doctrine of Jesus Christ. I know that this doctrine is taught in its fullness in Mormonism. All throughout my life I have had peace, strength, and security in my religious faith. Growing up in Mormonism changed everything for me in all the best ways. The Church of Jesus Christ has helped me learn how to ask questions with real intent and see others in the way the Lord sees them. I have realized more fully the power of Christ’s grace and understand the greatness that God has in store for my life.

If you are floundering in life and unsure about where to go or why you’re here, seek God. Talk to Mormon missionaries, because they can answer your questions. Just because you may not have grown up with Mormonism, that doesn’t mean that you can’t accept the gospel of Christ wherever you are right now. These blessings from The Church of Jesus Christ are available for anyone no matter their background or circumstance. I know that this gospel is true, and my life is evidence of that. Your life too can be proof of God’s infinite love and power.

Being parents is just what they always wanted. And they love it.

“Of course we have our crazy moments,” Thompson says, “but for the most part we just try to find the good things in the day and remember that they’re only going to be little for so long.”

As members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the Thompsons believe that maintaining a strong marriage and raising and teaching children are essential keys to happiness and their most important responsibilities on earth.

In fact, 81 percent of Mormons say being a good parent is “one of the most important things in life,” according to a new survey by the Pew Research Center‘s Forum on Religion & Public Life — the first survey of Mormons about Mormons, by a non-LDS research organization.

The survey of more than 1,000 self-identified Latter-day Saints from across the country asked how accepted Mormons feel in American culture, as well as their thoughts on religious practices, political issues and family roles.

The survey showed that Mormons are more likely to be married than the general population, 67 percent of the sample size compared to 52 percent of the general public.

And 85 percent of married Mormons married other Mormons. Protestants marry other Protestants 81 percent of the time and Catholics marry each other 78 percent of the time.

With an emphasis on marriage, it should come as no surprise that the Mormons surveyed also had, on average, more children (2.6) than the general U.S. population (1.8).

Thompson grew up wanting to have a large family and be a good mother, but she and her husband have struggled with infertility for nearly nine years — a trial punctuated by the joys of two different adoptions, Ellie, then the twins.

“We said when we finally get to be parents, we’re going to actually sit down and take a little more time to focus on our kids,” Thompson said, who lives in northern Utah. “I’m not saying that other people don’t do that — the perspective we have is just a little different.”

Other Latter-day Saints share the Thompson’s enthusiasm to put family first.

“Family is at the core of our faith,” says Jane Clayson Johnson, a Latter-day Saint and former anchor of CBS’s “The Early Show” who prefers the title of mom to two young children and stepmom to three older ones. “There are so many distractions today that all force us outward, away from core relationships. What our faith does is turn us back toward deep, rich, meaningful relationships in families.”

“It teaches us that families are where we find meaning,” continued Clayson from her home in Boston. “The work I do in my family is the most important work that I’ll ever do.”

Among the general public, 50 percent list being a good parent as “one of the most important things in life,” with 44 percent listing it as “very important but not most important.”

That shouldn’t be taken to mean that the average American doesn’t value marriage or family, just that they don’t “go to church every week and get told that’s what they’re supposed to do,” says Marie Cornwall, a professor of sociology at Brigham Young University. Cornwall advised the Pew Center for this survey.

“There’s nothing to suggest that family life is less valued in the United States over time,” she said, “but there’s more that suggests that people are feeling like it’s not possible for them to attain that.”

The pressure comes when a “successful” marriage is defined as having a good job, a hefty retirement account and a lovely home with a white picket fence, Cornwall said. So when people can’t achieve that in today’s tough economy, many feel like they’ve failed.

“For Mormons, there’s a spiritual aspect brought to that (definition of success),” she said, “an effort, in terms of sermons, to try and downplay the material and place more emphasis on the relationships.”

When the survey asked Mormons about working arrangements in families, nearly six out of 10 Mormons indicated they would prefer a marriage where the man works and the woman stays home to care for the home and the children.

LDS college graduates liked this marital structure more than any other subgroup, with 71 percent of them preferring the man to work and the woman to stay home.

In the general population, only 30 percent of Americans would prefer a marriage where the husband works and the wife stays home. Among religiously unaffiliated Americans, it drops to 15 percent who would pick such a scenario.

Almost four-in-10 Mormons would prefer that both parents work and both parents help with child rearing and housework.

For American Fork mom Ruth Ann Dupaix, 37, it’s not a black-or-white decision. Throughout her marriage she has both worked and stayed at home.

“The way we look at it, we try to make it a partnership,” Dupaix says. “It’s more who’s able at the time to do it best. It’s working together, a give and take.”

When she and her husband, Geoff, were first married, her job helped pay for his school. When he finished, she kept working because her employer would pay for her to complete her degree, and education was important to both of them.

Dupaix stopped working when her sixth child was born but has recently gone back to work at a local grocery store three nights a week to help fulfill a family goal to reduce their debt load.

It’s a big pay cut from the job she used to have at a bank, but it’s a more family friendly schedule.

“As part of a family you make sacrifices,” she said. “I’m gone when the kids are asleep, but I’m still here during the day when they need me.”

Additional Resources:

For original source Deseret News article: Mormon family marriage focus Pew.

Mormons in America Pew Study.